Ed hears ‘Let Her Go' on the radio
My girlfriend (who is asleep) just rolled over, wrapped her arms around me and very lovingly whispered “I want to murder you”
The important thing is she hasn’t yet and that means she loves you.
the next time you think you’re lonely, just remember you have about 25 billion white blood cells in your body protecting your sorry little ass with their life. you have 25 billion friends who would die for you. no need for tears.
President Obama Demands Another Shrek Movie